womanhood

The love and theory listening party

by leroy bean

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welcome to the center of my imagination; the color spectrum of my feels. where I gave my all in every piece of it or chose the right people that could bring it to life. nathan tipton a.k.a. junior astronaut was the executive producer on the album. i knew with his imagination, good ear, and taste in music he was the perfect person to create the sound for this album. from the very first recording session all the way to the end, it was almost too easy the way it came together. my favorite track we did, because of its complexity, is "women is/what is god". if it isn't bad enough that it's a pantoum poem (look it up) with color coded lines to create five poems in one, nathan brought the colors to sounds. so every color and every line was given a note and just so happened to come out beautiful when we played it. also since a pantoum plays on repetition he created a voice effect for each line, so you will notice lines that share the same vocal effect, are the lines that repeat. then the transition into "What is god" was so perfect! even though we did both tracks at separate times.

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my brother matthew vaughn from underdog academy (ua) also has one of my favorite parts on the project. in the track "slippery slope" nathan got an idea to sample matt's vocals from his song "dream factory" on soundcloud, as well as some left over sax from a session with ric sexton. slippery slope instantly became a favorite for me. speaking of ric sexton, his place on the album was perfect as well; from "thank god for your existence" to "do you mind, love", he really added that smooth jazzy feel that i wanted. i love the sax!

and lastly my girl mariah is the featured singer on the project. when you have any type of musical project i feel like singing has to be in there somewhere! i'm a huge fan when it comes to her voice and i'm glad my project was one of the first to help her increase her confidence. my favorite from her is "what is love" because the feeling and emotion she put in that was crazy! but "what is beauty" is low key my favorite because of how smoooooooth it rides.

for this to be my first music project, i can say that i am very happy with it and I hope you enjoy it as much as me. 

what is woman?

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love yourself

by kimberly newton

she sits in silence

pondering how gracious her inner being has been to herself

she looks at everything she once believed, everything she told herself.

some good, some bad. some things she wished she never had…..said or done…..

she sits in wonder.

through her darkest days. how she was afraid to show her radiance to the world.

she sat in her loneliness. her view obscured by darkness, aphotic, lifeless.

she avoided the truth like the plague. creating illusions that haunted her. stood in her fears, crying in shame. but who’s to blame?

she aimed to claim fame, but constantly burned by her own flame. too afraid to put out the hate, scarred from her past of bad relationships. sexual involvement with multiple partners. she lay. empty

such a precious jewel but fueled by animosity of her own atrocities and the detestation of others who seemed to have hated her but only hated themselves because of their own self-projections. what a reflection.

wake up beautiful one. find your peace. not a piece. he can’t offer you anything but waste your time with lies, full of deceit all smoke and mirrors when you look, who do you see?

love yourself until you love yourself. but what does that mean?

look within goddess.

through meditation and forgiveness you’ve learned to keep pushing. reveal yourself. unveil your past. it is not your future. it does not predicate who you forever will be. don’t you see?

love

something so mundane. very easy to say but so hard to claim.

love

not what you say, but what you do. through generational curses, you can subdue the untrue you, push through... goddess.

what your mother carried in her womb has been released through you. you do not have to carry the torch of her past, pasts, pasts, transgressions and untruths.

love conquers fear

trumps guilt

overshadows hate

cures evil

transcends distress ‘til all your fears dissipates

immortalizes immortality

and circumvents your discomfort

god-dess

god…….desss

god….does

god….is

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love yourself until you love yourself

create a harmonious sound that resonates so deep within you that the heavens seep in the lives of others from the godly words that you speak. keep your waters pure and your integrity meek.

be open to love in various forms. respect yourself and all others. love does not hurt it gives joy to all your sisters and your brothers.

from your lowest esteem to your highest esteem. let your femininity shine bright. for you are wombman a goddess, you are a bringer of light.

a sexual being and a sensual being. in your totality you are truth. your truth compliments your being. from what you birth it shall never die. be the LOVE that you seek. goddess awaken. now is your reprise.

being woman is claiming your freedom!  inside and out!!!

kim is an artists of multiple talents, you can connect with her on facebook: kimberly newton and on instagram: @poetik_lioness

what is woman?

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you cute for a fat girl...

gwen

“i just don't get it... why her? You can do so much prettier and finer, so much skinnier.” I think it was this time last year when i heard that exact comment being said about me to someone i cared about, from a “friend.”

after getting out of a toxic relationship where i was made to feel I wasn’t beautiful by him and those around him, i was at my lowest last winter. i didn’t want to go out. i felt like nothing looked good on me. i didn’t even want to be around men because i felt like i knew what they were all thinking. it’s not something i chose. even though it’s something i can change. and i haven’t always been plus sized. i remember the first time my mom told me that i would need to look in the “plus sized” section for an outfit because it would fit better (in all reality I only needed an xl) and i started to cry. how crazy is that? but what i can say now, at 22 years old, is that after getting the love and support from the people i cherish the most and taking the needed amount of time to self care, i got back to that place that i was in at the beginning of 2016. it took me such a long time to realize that not being a size 2 isn’t something to be ashamed of. it took me all the way up until last year when i moved to hawaii to cherish and love myself the way i should. being in a place where full figured women were respected and worshiped
the same as petite women was so refreshing.

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but now, mid summer 2017, i’m happier than ever and i don’t think i will ever let another man or person for that matter make me feel less than for the way i look or body i have. i was SO nervous to do this and absolutely terrified to post these, but that’s what it’s all about. loving yourself. i did this photoshoot because here today, i want to start a body positivity campaign. plus size/fuller women/bodies that aren’t looked at as “sexy” in today’s society are slowly but surely getting more representation in the media/fashion industry. but i know especially here in dayton it’s not represented nearly enough. i won’t be this size forever, but it’s the body I have now. and i’ll be damned if i don’t love every
single inch and curve!

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connect with gwen:

instagram: @_gwenola + twitter: @_gwenolabar + email: cgbrown95@icloud.com

what is woman?

leroy bean

this guest blog is by leroy bean, author of the love and theory of womanology. 

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a spoken word poet  from dayton, ohio starting my new artistic journey as leroy bean. after being apart of underdog academy for over 2 years, i have had the opportunity to perform at many colleges and universities such as ohio state university, ohio dominican university, university of cincinnati and more. i was the 2017 litfest poetry slam winner for the university of dayton and was chosen to be published in both their orpheus and writ literary magazines. i am the host of the underdog academy's expressions open mic and now i am finally releasing my second chapbook - the love and theory of womanology.

this complete project includes a chapbook with 37 poems, including a 7 poem series, 16 haiku's, and a pantoum. also includes an audio book that isn't your traditional read along on tape. the audio book is all put together over instrumentals to provide a completely separate experience from the chapbook itself even though the poems have not changed. one gives you room to implement your own imagination and the other sits you in the center of my imagination and feel for the project as a whole and the individual poems.  i've always approached my poems from a different perspective; creating story's or satirical poems to get my point across.

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in december 2016 I was inspired by music, conversation, and just consistent signs pointing me down this path to create a chapbook dedicated to woman. after reaching a new point on this journey for developing a better understanding for love and compassion for all life, i realized that i have been blinded by my male privilege. from the experience as a black male in america, i have witnessed oppression first hand and was able to transfer that comprehension to the relationship between man and woman. it was made clear to me how much of a habit sexism was alone and although i did not install this way of thinking on my own, it is still my responsibility to recognized my mistakes in order to grow as a human. this lead me to build a chapbook, metaphorically giving woman the power that was bestowed upon men, "in the beginning", with genesis by characterizing god as a woman that not just created but gave birth to the universe. also emphasizing on the characteristics that woman are deemed weak for, such as their love and support. also bringing important woman characters to the forefront such as mother nature, eve, and the roll of "the mother" in american society.

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upon the ending of the books creation it dawned on me that if i really wanted to help influence as much of the community as possible then I would have to bring the book to life. this lead to the event, "what is woman?" where I teamed up with ap2 photography and ted's own big dave to help bring the vision to life; men using their platform to help bring shine to the woman's perspective and experience. although this is a release event for my new chapbook, the book is far from being the face of the event. this premium art experience showcases nothing but the strength and struggles of women. using the power of art and it's influence on people, we dedicated paintings and photo shoots to the diverse beauty of woman and counter the countless shaming that society puts on women that don't fall within it's standards. what is woman? showcases female vendors and performers to portray the wide-range of talent that women have. It will be held in a business owned by a woman to show their strength and intelligence. what is woman? will challenge the audience with that very title by having a panel discussion to assure that the voice of the woman is heard. even if it is only in front of 50 to 100 people, i know it will still be effective because at the end of the day, communication leads to solutions and  seeds will get planted to initiate a ripple of change in the minds of the future. 

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what is woman will take place satuday, september 2 at third perk coffeehouse & wine bar in downtown dayton, ohio at 7:00pm. tickets are limited and are available to purchase on eventbrite, “includes the option to preorder the book as well.”